a judgement

My life is a jumble, a strange one; it shouldn't’t be so hard for everyone to just get on with it. Like a thousand piece jigsaw puzzle, don’t leave it unfinished, keep adding, keep adding, and keep adding.
I know I try, it’s tough to know who you are, but you don’t ignore a bad jigsaw piece with a clipped end or hide it under the carpet. Expression is sometimes the best way to actually remain inconspicuous. Living with it openly is the best way to overcome suffering. And so the puzzle slowly completes itself.

Today I was hurt, but it’s something I can always get over as time passes by… I want to get back at this hurt but I did that once before and hated it, regretted it, couldn't’t even control it…. …I knew it was wrong and I wonder why anger leads me to do such things. The ramification was terrible, I see now how it affects others; it’s definitely harder to get over it when you got the whole lot in on it.
If I try get back at it now I know it’ll hurt somebody else…but is my happiness conquering my own hurt what is the best for me? What the doctor ordered exactly?