SMELL FUNNY???

lets start off this thing with something weird about me...happy new year now read!!!!!!!!

Ever thought you had a talent that no one else had?
lets just say my nose is gifted with the overly tuned sense of smell...and i hate it...ask Inez...i really cant bare some smells...i wish i could remove this all together because funnily enough it comes to a point where i can identify a type of person be it mother or boy...by the getting a whiff of their pee...yup VERY gross...but also very true!!!its as if I'm a blood hound searching for some asparagus!!!!!!!!!!!GAH
I know though that if i lost my sense of smell...i would be very sad...because call it cliche i love the smell of roses...red in particular(because ostensibly a colour goes with smell of course)the darker the better, give one a sniff and see if the sweetness climbs up your nose(sniff it more intensely this time) and see if a tingle between the eyes occurs for wonderful little chemicals rush up your nose...as if setting yourself ablaze and filling your head with happiness. roses are adored on my part for that.
oh yes and rain, one could never forget rain, how it unleashes the fragrance of the earth as it falls upon the ground. its heavy on the nose and makes you close you eyes to take it in...somewhere in all of that you can feel the vapour carry the scent of vegetation being watered and its hot, hot because the steam off the earth is wafting in up there and its sandy, you can almost feel the grains fly up your nose... rain in Africa makes me remember we're all warm with energy...i wonder what cold rain feels like??? =)

one must never forget the smell of food,be it bubblegum or a roast or even some fridge pizza...every time you smell food, yes your instincts kick in...IT'S TIME TO FEED!
your mouth waters as it should and it pleads for the nose to carry one, one sniff, two sniff, three sniff MORE! do you know you actually are breathing some of that food in...ah how amazing smell is!

even with the foul smells of this world, the ones that damage us and send us cringing; hurt us by just existing and make us wish we hadn't ventured so far...remember...there is always a silver lining and I'm happy i have such a lovely ability of enhancing such pleasant things...get in tune with them...yes happy i am, happy indeed!

sister gone and parents away....Ive been left alone before, but the sudden realisation that this is what adulthood had in store...i crumbled, sobbing by the computer at my empty home...not to mention terrified,yup definitely considering living in a shack(ONE ROOM THAT'S IT) that way i can see/hear/smell/touch everything, so instead of throwing a mad house party like any 18 would...i confined myself to locking myself up in my room with dogs,water, chocolate sauce and a collection of weapons ranging from knives,bug spray,dozens and dozens of pairs of scissors scattered under pillows,bed side table,shelf,in cupboard, and even stooping down to a squash racket and whistle...i had the bed,i had the computer,supplies were very good indeed!temperature could vary if i turned the fan on or pulled up the blankets...i was fine....remaining in MY room for a week,only leaving during the day when staff were about! stop thinking I'm a wussie....STOP...its perfectly normal for any child to over react...i had to fend for myself...against the perils of my own abode...there are freaky things out there you know, jeez my guard killed a snake just outside my front door,now imagine me wondering about, a definite or the slight possible target to a black as pitch ruthless reptile(i wont be taking any chances)...and the insects, as if the Pharaoh of my dwelling had disobeyed god and appearing by the hundreds a plague of crickets and beetles swarm about; chirping nonchalantly in hidden location(such as inside the shower drain,which surprisingly holds an echo threshold...aaaah the sound shall never be associated with tranquility AGAIN)....then the creaks and squeaks, bumps and grinds of the roof and walls....certainly playing tricks on me as i cower behind corners with a knife in a vice like grip...jumping out and wondering if the fiend is in fact behind me all along,like an evil clown goofing about before he strikes....it wasn't pleasant...no not at all!

but mommy and daddy came back...yay for me for they spoiled me because of my dreadful time....yes...i know...how manipulative...but grateful nonetheless for the thought they put into it,i got a lovely shirt, 2 pairs of trousers a very large pen with BEN10 on it(oh the primary kids at school will be so jealous) and this book called strange Emily or something....its a lovely dark kids book....i appreciate the thought my parents put into it very much!

otherwise got my ears pierced on the art trip i went on to Kenya...first time out of the country on my own...again another step into adulthood...its all dawning on me very quickly...being 18 now makes me wonder where my inner kid has gone...all my friends are younger(even if by 2 days-talking about you Inez)and the other day one of them(13)told me i sound like their mother now...what the hell...i haven't changed....grrr and if deema reads this....my hips do click and crack...but for goodness sack....yours do too....hahahahahahaha

right I'm off...reading a novel to help me study for English on tuesday!!!nervous...uh...yes...
but good options for uni in 2012....but that's for another time
xxx

I seem to like the night...daytime you’ll see me sleep in till afternoon (2-3 if I’m the given the chance) night time I’m wide eyed and bushy tailed, alert and performing my best, not to say I’m not functional during the day; just that come nightfall I seem to want to interact with my world a little bit more...sun can make me grumpy and hot weather makes my brain tick...ha here like a superhero I bare my kryptonite weaknesses, simple physical weaknesses, that can be played against me...icy chills is what I like, I enjoy the bite and prickle upon the skin and the white breath masking the face, the element of darkness is so alluring, it makes me tingle thinking about it, how hiding under the silver luminosity is ravishingly captivating, titillating upon the skin, the night spell used so that imagination isn’t wasted on spotting things spoilt and exposed by sunlight, exploited of its hidden talents, its inner beauty that can vary vast or be elfin in effect...even small difference won’t be noticed and what way to feel special right?

Night is precious because like Terry Pratchett’s character Mort (deaths apprentice) whose description during a moment of his life theories crusade...wondered why night had to be dark, that people couldn’t see anything at night and should need light, like in the day, but then that would defeat some point he thought (like he didn’t get why peoples teeth had to be white)...see night offers such rarity, of course it comes everyday (Serbia and what not excluded some parts of the year)but what can you really find in the obscurity of its unlit domain of each period of day, if you open your eyes wide enough, the sneaky, the creepy and the crawlies emerge and the silence can be watched. What seems distant fantasy is only the surreal mind frame, things only dreamed come to life in the grey light... colour is deafened and the dream like reality is pleasant and wanted more and more.

Night time is gorgeous for the twinkles of the sky and our orbiting moon rips through the purest of shadows, not in sudden open view but subtle and really quite gentle...I truly do love the night because I am comfortable with myself and my surroundings and can feel hidden at any given moment due the superb chance of darkness.


By Neil creek

Night Sky over the Church of the Good Shepherd . . .

This photo was taken the night before the panorama of the church you can see here on this site. The weather that day had been unseasonably windy, to the point that the waves on Lake Tekapo even had whitecaps. This near gale-force wind was coming right off the glaciers and cut right through you. It was into this weather that I ventured out in the pitch black night under the spectacular night sky to capture some photos of the Church of the Good Shepherd by starlight.

Rugged up, bare handed, with tripod and kit bag, I looked around for a good spot, and fought the howling winds. I don’t have a cable release and I quickly discovered that I needed more than the maximum 30 seconds shutter speed. I spent the next half hour sitting by the tripod as low as it would go for stability, finger holding down the shutter while I took shot after shot counting to 120 or 240 seconds, trying not to move during the exposure. For fear of getting more exposure than the sensor, I came inside after half an hour. I only got this one decent photo, but it was worth it. It was this experience that lead me to buy a wireless remote shutter release.

Horses- Edwin Muir

haha...funny!!!


The poem screams at me!!!
I love its vocab, its pace, its rhythm...when I think about doing a LAMDA exam...this is what I feel would make me pass with flying colours...
I want to be the horses, in fact the poem makes me believe it...
Their on going might and frightening hulk that makes us humans(powerful in comparison)miniature and feeble.
In a way it expresses how long suffering the horses are, working non stop leaving a 'furrow' behind as their tracks
without complaint, but still obvious to the eye, their body language baring anger. terrifying, but not acted upon, composure kept

here it is...
HORSES

Those lumbering horses in the steady plough,
On the bare field - I wonder why, just now,
They seemed terrible, so wild and strange,
Like magic power on the stony grange.

Perhaps some childish hour has come again,
When I watched fearful, through the blackening rain,
Their hooves like pistons in an ancient mill
Move up and down, yet seem as standing still.

Their conquering hooves which trod the stubble down
Were ritual that turned the field to brown,
And their great hulks were seraphim of gold,
Or mute ecstatic monsters on the mould.

And oh the rapture, when, one furrow done,
They marched broad-breasted to the sinking sun!
The light flowed off their bossy sides in flakes;
The furrows rolled behind like struggling snakes.

But when at dusk with the streaming nostrils home
They came, they seemed gigantic in the gloam,
And warm and glowing with mysterious fire
That lit their smouldering bodies in the mire.

Their eyes as brilliant and as wide as night
Gleamed with a cruel apocalyptic light.
Their manes the leaping ire of the wind
Lifted with rage invisible and blind.

Ah, now it fades! It fades! and I must pine
Again for that dread country crystalline,
Where the black field and the still-standing tree
Were bright and fearful presences to me.

my sister

I I love my sister....
but I just don't see my world without her...I kept her out for what seemed like eternity,which was such a shadowing time for me, because now it has dawned on me that my last year with her has been spoilt all because I let immaturity get in the way...I only have her for a short time now and I just cant make it count...
the other day my moms friends younger sister died: due to malaria...this lady was distraught because she did nothing...I mean there were so many opportunities to take care of her sister, bring her back to health,but all signs were ignored
and when my sister moves away...I wont even be able to protect her...believe me for years I thought I would never do that(that I would want to) but as Ive gotten older the fights I got into have made me realise that somehow piper came to my rescue...in her own dorky older sis way...my eyes have been opened, she would scream shout banter ignore glare...you name it...all to make me safe...and now I'm ever so grateful but.....
how could I EVER repay her(I mean for crying out loud she taught me about the light and heaven-weird lil story-she taught me how to swim,she taught me how to read and draw,she's been my dance partner when everyone is too scared to go onto the dancefloor besides us 2)....and gosh darn it feels like holding onto her only makes her smothered and pull away from me more!!!!I'M DOOMED



we have this sister book that she'll take away with her to Canada...it has lists on what to do up there,notes from me and notes from her...pictures of boys(a small dedication to vampires)...'lil cartoons...fun facts about each of us...but its not anywhere near finished and I feel as time runs out....so will moments to fill up the book with memories!!!!Its meant to keep her company up there in cold wintry midst of CANADA....gosh...I have to have a whole year without her...and if this realisation hasn't come too late I sit and remember what Ive done without her and most of it is pointless





pi...my miss pickada nose pal...my nerd...my boob pusher...and literal reader....my sweet kind,trusty,fabulously voluptuous girl... I love you so terribly much, you make up my stars and all my sky in my entire universe...you can be counted on and will always keep people in line...I swear it will drive us mad but we need the simple adoration from you to sustain our existence!!! you are my world Piper-Moore, my purpose and my best friend...I wish I could always be with you but I must let my majestic bird grow and fly...I will miss you but I know dam sure well that you will return home as you are just that sort of beautiful person.....
keep safe my dear wonderful girl...you will eclipse me for eternity...I shall love you forever(we are connected afterall my dear)....dream big and go far,I'm right behind you no matter what
xxx

If one demon of peril would suck the life from me,
And leave me on eternal earth amongst the dim dead and him.
I, a maiden in dire need of love, would accept my doom with arms opened in welcoming.

As he would pace over to my delicate body, he would bend my neck to the right and edge towards my pulsing jugular. His fangs would protrude out of his mouth and prick my skin. Blood scarlet of colour will ooze out, only to be indulged by his thirst.

The venom surging through me, thinning my blood as it moves en route for my pacing heart, only burns as he takes each mouthful.

I fear he will bleed me out, but his groaning – over the taste – pleasures me.

If he could not stop, I don’t think I would mind as much.

Dare to face the full moon
To smell the air
And sense a heat
That breath gently blowing cool
From the warmth of the heart
The scent a spell over hell man
Who thirsts for a kiss red.